Dear Destiny,
How do I start to talk to people more/make conversation?
Sincerely,
Wishing for Words
Dear Wishing for Words,
When I first saw your question, I wasn’t quite sure what I wanted to say, because I also struggle with making conversation! I honestly think most people can relate to this. The most important thing is to not overthink it. Believe me, I know a thing or two about overthinking. I do it all the time. Overthinking can prevent you from making a friend, so don’t let it stop you! Just take a deep breath and talk to the person. It sounds simple, but that’s really all you can do. There’s no real “trick” to talking to more people; you just have to put yourself out there and do it. It may seem weird and awkward at first, but the people you are talking to will not think that.
Here are a couple tips to help you out:
An easy way to talk to people is when you’re in class with them. You can ask simple questions, like “Hey, I’m a little confused on question #4. What did you get?” or “Are you ready for the test on Friday?” Easy questions like this shouldn’t be very stressful and will hopefully lead to more conversation between the two of you. You can also find something you share in common. Do you both take Chemistry? Do you both have little siblings? Maybe you both share a love for Starbucks. Whatever it is, make it your common ground. Talk to them about it. Listen to them talk about it. If you want to be a good conversationalist, you also have to learn how to be a good listener.
Join clubs! PV offers so many clubs. Find one you are interested in and join it! It may seem scary, especially if you don’t know anyone in the club, but trust me, it will be worth it. There is a high chance that you will talk to lots of people, and possibly even gain a few friends!
Most of all, be positive! When you reflect positive energy, positive energy will come to you, usually in the form of other people. Even though you may be really nervous, SMILE! Trust me, smiling and staying positive will make all the difference. I know it can be scary to talk to people, but it’s a very important skill to have. And like all things, it just takes practice.
Lots of love,
Destiny